Welcome back....

[haneen]

Welcome back....

 

By: Alyaa Majeed

March 2020

 

Recoreded https://soundcloud.com/safaahasan/wellcome-back

 

                 Not too long ago, people relied on social communication and descriptions to find a place. Then maps made life much easier and more accurate to find destinations. And when technology blast to give birth to iPhones, even drivers like me who could get lost in any given situation, could proudly find a way to find the way.
               That being said, there is alway the assumptions of a literate user who can provide  the input in order to get the output, when the destination is known. So It was really a mind blowing to see someone who does not own an iPhone and  can not read a map, yet still very much capable of finding a place with a %100 accuracy.
               When I first saw them,  I could not believe my eyes. It was both excitement and curiosity.  They usually come once a year and stay for a while. It was so heart warming to see them roaming around the place one more time. I was so eager to know how far they travel,  and where they live, but since they tend to be aloof with people around them, I guess I will never find out.
              They bring inspiration and joy to whoever hear or notice them.   And  even after raising two generations of multiple offsprings, they are still beautiful, active, and in a good shape to travel and produce some more cute babies. I am sure they have their own issues to think and worry about, like their safety, and the well being of their young ones. Lucky for them though, they are not going to be placed in any quarantine going back home, not even a self voluntary one,  for they don’t use any transportations to travel....as they enjoy the freedom of their flying wings.
                 It never occurred to me that I  would be envious of those charming souls. It was always the admiration that came to my mind first when I saw them last year, and contentment came next. This time, being trapped in my own home trying desperately
to fulfill my family’s needs, watching them mingle with nature freely ..no fear, no worries, and no anger, I felt different. I felt dull, sad, and helpless. The corona virus did not only take away the happiness, the inspiration, or the freedom. By invading the time, it altered order and logic for chaos and confusion. it replaced all the positive thoughts with negative ones, it captured the soul and befell the reality. We began counting our breaths instead of letting our bodies breathe naturally.  We started focusing on tomorrow’s unknown and forgetting today’s existence. As for the destination, we could not rely on our memories, Mapquest, or even I phones any more . For it is more like a cycle .. there is listening, worrying, talking, thinking,  stopping, hoping, and then going back to listening and so on and so forth. Something that almost all of us have been doing ever since this nightmare launched. It is more like we fall asleep hoping for it to end, and waking up the next day disappointed and hoping for the same wish to come true.
                
              Sometimes I ask myself if all this was real. In the middle of this enormous, dark, full of waves ocean, we all stand together. At this point, finding the harbor seems almost impossible. Our hands are tight, and there are a lot of things we can not do....I wonder if
 we could break the cycle..or remember similar days that passed...is it possible to hope for a resolved future...find a light to read the letters..even if it is dim.. even when our eyes are trembling, even when an aggressive harsh virus  like the corona hit. Can we look at the whole picture; there are plenty of dark spots harming  it, but can we notice any portion that is still visible, transparent or worth looking at. We need to believe that this is not the destination! It is not the end! We need to believe in magic, in fate! in a better outcome. We need to believe that this bump in our way is temporary and evacuating. May be then and only then we can live today, embrace yesterday, and enhearten  tomorrow.